Monday, August 15, 2011

Full Moon?

There is beauty in humility, pain in love, sacrifice in giving, and purpose in living!

     Is there a full moon? I'm not sure how much of "that stuff" I believe in, but it just seems something is in the air. I had more friends and family tell me about crazy things that have happened to them in the last couple of days then I can remember in a while. A friend's house got robbed, another friend has been trying to help a suicidal neighbor, my brother's family came down with the stomach flu,  etc. And unfortunately it was a wake up call for me...."Hey Bone're not the only one going through something right now." Even crazier....the world becomes very small and lifeless when it's all about me. Then when I find out something else (and in this case a lot of somethings) is going on it's a deer caught in the headlight look from me. "You mean the world is still existing without me?" lol  I wonder if that's not a huge trap of the enemy?
    I'm not trying to invalidate my reality right now (because it's SUCKS)...but I this a normal scheme of the devil? We get so obsessed and focused on our own pain that we can not see the forest through the trees? I'm grateful for the lessons I have learned...that when I need help it's okay to rely on others, see the red flags for what they are, trust yourself and friends.....but it's not okay to forget that we are all apart of a bigger picture. Yes, there are seasons for everything...and it's okay to grieve, it's okay to need time to focus on self, and it's okay to even disappear for a time to work through things...It fact it's my time to die (metaphorically speaking) and mourn....BUT when we are eternally does much of that change? The focus I mean.
    I don't want to focus solely on myself. Don't get me wrong...I need the focus to work on a few things that need major tweeking...but focusing only on me causes me to forget the reason I'm love God and live for others. To further the kingdom and beat the crap out of Satan's plan to diminish the people of God.  I think Satan wants us to get preoccupied with ourselves and our mess so that we are so bound we can't aid in the freedom of others. Believe me I KNOW this is easier "typed" then practiced....there are days I don't want to get out of bed much less listen to one of teens talk about their dysfunctional relationships or a friend rehash some daily difficulty...but it's in those moments I have to remember..."I am confident of this..I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13. I must remember...if even one of my teens walks away free and can lead others into freedom....the struggle was worth it. If a friend felt wanted and understood maybe they will be more engaged with their child or husband. This puts me in a place of humility and responsibility. It also allows me a place to openly receive the help I need but also understand that place will be called upon in the learn now...learn deeply and heal fully.

My Survival Plan

Read my Bible - Psalms 34 and 37

"Psalms 27:13, "I am confident of this, that I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living."

Worship - nope....but I will

Work out - yes 50 minutes...but I just purchased and tried "Turbo Jam" from it

Do something for someone else - sent a fun card to a friend

Do something for myself - went out with a old college buddy

Eat well - probably not

Emotional state: happy

High point: went tanning and told the tanning salon I won't be renewing my

Low point: reality check about my self-absorption lately

Tip of the day:  a merry heart, doth good like a medicine...LAUGH

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