I posted these verses once before....WAY back in the day...but in light of some recent conversations and knowing what a few of my friends are going through...I felt it important to post it once again!
NOW for the blog!!!!
I didn't realize it has been 5 months since my last blog. I guess one could look at that as progress? Or no progress? Or somewhere inbetween? Honestly, I have no idea.
BUT that has given me 5 months to report on the dating scene. OH THE DATING SCENE. Lets see...I have been out with men that I am confused how we ended up on a date; pursued by men that dont get a hint; flash pan encounters that seemed so encouraging but ended up ending as qucikly at they started; and then the good guys that I just WISH there was a spark but nothing.
How do I stay encouraged???? How do I believe that God has someone for me in light of an ocean of ridculous encounters, endless text messages, blind dates, first dates, great dates with no hope, emotionally unavailable men, and men that just want a buddy (I dont camp!!!!). How do I? Because I have found a spark of hope...and believe me that spark was not present for years!
I found that hope in the belief of my friends...in my family. I found the hope in changing my prespective...and I found the spark when I realized that God is MY father. Just like my earthly father, my HEAVENLY father wants to fulfill the desires of my heart. I know for a fact my dad prays for me daily. I know he has a vision and hope for my life. I know one of his desires is to see me happy and prosperous...and having little grandbaby girls (dont tell anyone ;)) The Bible asks, "how much more does our HEAVENLY father want to see us happy then our earthly father" (my lame mans paraphrase...obviously).
Getting to this place is not easy....and it is NOT attached to another relationship, a new adventure or a moment of reprieve. The spark of hope is from a really deep, true understanding that you deserve God's best...and HE WANTS THAT FOR YOU!!!! I did some of that by FLOODING myself with uplifting messages (love Kris Valloton), HS worship (Kim Walker-Smith), or even worldly avenues like "The Secret" (positive thinking, Law of Attraction).
TO be honest...that isn't easy or natural for me...but once I felt that spark (all Holy Spirit oriented) at the beginning of this year I have fought to keep it. I have listened to sermons of hope and fulfilling dreams, to positive oriented situations, seeking out my friends and families that are believing for me, reading books about it, etc. A lot of this is because I FINALLY believe it! I believe I can have it...and of course saying that...putting me out there...I fight the cringe of "what if"...but that is only a result of what I have been through.
I know I deserve God's best...and when my family and friends...tell me I am the whole package..I want to believe, SO I finally CHOSE to believe it..... then that means I accept that...and If I choose to embrace that I feel a tremendous amount of humility and responsibilitiy. I want to be that woman...and that means anyone that comes along my path...GREAT or not....I treat as though they are what? A step along the way? A direction sign that tells me to stop, go forward, you can get there from here but it will take you longer? I THINK its a lot like the Rascal Flatts song, "Every long long dream lead me to where you are. Others who have broke my heart they were like Northern stars pointing me on my way into your loving arms. This much I know is true...that God blessed the broken road that lead me straight to YOU!'
